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I am Touring The World At 84. Right here Are My Secrets and techniques To A Lengthy, Wholesome Life.

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September 7, 2024

Advancing age and the accompanying decline in psychological acuity and bodily power have been mentioned lots these days — particularly when the 2024 presidential election featured two of the oldest candidates in historical past till President Joe Biden withdrew his candidacy in July.

Nevertheless, many senior residents are main energetic and productive lives. I’m 84 years previous and in good well being, each mentally and bodily. I can’t say for sure why I’m in such fine condition, however I attribute it to sure routines I’ve adopted over time.

I’ve stayed fairly self-sufficient and don’t like individuals prejudging what I can and can’t do due to my age. A couple of years in the past, after I was in my late 70s, my daughter’s childhood buddy visited us along with her husband. At some point, we wanted to take one thing down from a excessive shelf. I walked to the storage and introduced out a stepladder. The husband instantly reacted as if I had accomplished one thing incorrect.

“Uncle,” he mentioned, “you shouldn’t be doing this at your age.” I instructed him I used to be completely succesful, however he proceeded to take the ladder from me and get the merchandise.

Two Decembers in the past, a younger relative stayed with us for just a few days. One morning, I made tea and introduced it to her at our breakfast desk.

“What is that this?” she mentioned. “You sit. I’ll make breakfast.”

I instructed her that I make breakfast every single day. I’ve been doing this and different family chores for years. I’m not going to cease simply because I get previous.

Right here’s my tackle residing a passable and lengthy, wholesome life. I’m not, by any means, an skilled on something — these are my ideas primarily based on how I’m residing my life and why I believe it’s serving to me.

The writer and his spouse, Bharati, visited Machu Picchu in Peru in October 2016.

Courtesy of Ashok Shenolikar

1. Don’t procrastinate on doing what you wish to do.

My spouse and I’ve all the time made time to trip in numerous elements of the world, concentrate on hobbies and be taught new abilities.

In simply the previous 18 months, we witnessed the glory of lavender fields in full bloom in France, ziplined in Costa Rica and cruised alongside the Chilean Fjords to Argentina. In earlier travels, we visited a lot of Western Europe, nearly all of South America, plus South Africa and Zambia. We have now visited the ends of the three continents — Kanyakumari in India, Cape of Good Hope in Africa and Cape Horn in South America. We have now seen Niagara Falls, Victoria Falls and lately, Iguazu Falls. Our bucket listing has reached all-time low. If one thing pops up sooner or later, we’ll take the chance. However we really feel fulfilled.

After I posted a few of our journey images, one among my nephews mentioned, “Uncle, I’m impressed by your enthusiasm, curiosity, and vitality in touring to all these fantastic locations at your age. You might be an octogenarian nomad.”

Our lives have been enriched by all this journey. We met attention-grabbing people who find themselves gardeners, artists, ebook lovers and foodies, identical to us. We made long-lasting friendships. I can’t think about what my life can be if I simply stayed put.

2. Love, belief and help your vital different.

In July, my spouse Bharati and I celebrated our 54th wedding ceremony anniversary. After residing so a few years collectively, I’ve discovered how love and appreciation develop due to shared experiences. Having been collectively for over half a century, by thick and skinny, I take into consideration the which means and significance of our wedding ceremony vows.

We’re each Hindus. Within the Vedic wedding ceremony ceremony, there’s a ritual of Saptapadi (seven steps round a hearth, for the fireplace god) throughout which we made vows just like “for higher, for worse, for richer, for poorer, in illness and in well being, to like and to cherish, until loss of life us do half.”

Wanting again, I ponder how we survived our preliminary years after we had been married, after we confronted lengthy odds. After our wedding ceremony, Bharati needed to keep again in India after I returned to America. It took her one 12 months to get her visa as a result of India’s authorities paperwork. After she arrived within the U.S., she needed to acclimate to a brand new nation far completely different from the place she had lived.

All newlyweds have challenges when beginning a brand new life collectively, however ours had been exacerbated by the financial local weather within the early Seventies. I graduated with a grasp’s diploma in engineering from the College of Oklahoma. On the time, the nation was within the grip of a extreme recession. Giant corporations had been shedding individuals. It took me greater than two years to realize footing in a very good job.

Our earnings had been meager throughout this era, however we nonetheless loved our life. Within the following years, we suffered the lack of our first youngster to spina bifida and two tough pregnancies just a few years later. We recovered from all of this and had a fairly profitable middle-class life. I discovered that when two individuals love, belief and help one another, issues are inclined to work out.

The author and his wife, Bharati, pose together in Hyderabad, India, on their wedding day (July 1970).
The writer and his spouse, Bharati, pose collectively in Hyderabad, India, on their wedding ceremony day (July 1970).

Courtesy of Ashok Shenolikar

3. Modify your life-style as your physique adjustments.

Our our bodies change as we grow old, and we have to regulate. Don’t dwell in denial. We have now to hearken to our our bodies in addition to to docs. When you’ve got an issue with listening to, get a listening to support. When you’ve got an issue with steadiness, get a cane. I’ve one which converts to a chair so I can sit when I’m bored with standing.

After doing chores for over 40 years, I now keep away from doing stuff which will trigger bodily hurt, resembling shoveling snow or mowing the garden. I’m extraordinarily cautious to keep away from falls. After attending an everyday yoga class for years, I’ve switched to chair yoga. I now use a recumbent bike as an alternative of an everyday one. And there’s one new factor I’ve began doing that I by no means did in my youthful years: I take a day nap.

Throughout our many travels, we got here throughout many individuals utilizing canes, walkers and wheelchairs who had been in a position to participate in outside excursions. Their getting older our bodies didn’t cease them from having fun with their trip.

4. Maintain busy and intellectually occupied.

One of many challenges of retired life is staying occupied. Studies have shown that mentally stimulating work helps stave off dementia. That is sensible to me. There’s loads of time to fill. You may solely watch a lot TV. It’s a must to discover issues that problem your mind.

Simply earlier than I retired in my early 70s, I began studying Spanish. It’s my fourth language after Hindi, Marathi and English.

I watch Spanish telenovelas, and each Saturday, I attend a Zoom meetup group to apply talking (I could make small discuss). I come throughout new phrases throughout these conferences, however I quickly overlook them. It’s like remembering the names of strangers at events.

“The shortcoming to retrieve names, even these we all know effectively, is a typical grievance of getting older,” a recent article in The Washington Post famous, including that forgetfulness by itself will not be an indication of cognitive points.

I spend no less than a few hours, Monday by Friday, engaged in writing-related actions: a brand new weblog, brainstorming subjects for a brand new piece, researching alternatives to publish. I’ve printed a novel and have completed a second manuscript.

From left to right, the author's son Sachin, daughter-in-law Alka, granddaughter Ruhi, wife Bharati, daughter Sukanya, granddaughter Maya, grandson Kieran, the author, and son-in-law Ryan pose on vacation in November 2023. "We're ready for a zip-line adventure in Costa Rica!" he writes.
From left to proper, the writer’s son Sachin, daughter-in-law Alka, granddaughter Ruhi, spouse Bharati, daughter Sukanya, granddaughter Maya, grandson Kieran, the writer, and son-in-law Ryan pose on trip in November 2023. “We’re prepared for a zip-line journey in Costa Rica!” he writes.

Courtesy of Ashok Shenolikar

5. Make every single day as productive as doable.

Folks typically say I look youthful than I’m. I haven’t accomplished something particular to attain this feat. I’m an peculiar man residing an peculiar life, however I’ve created a selected construction to my life.

You would possibly say my days are like these of Invoice Murray within the film “Groundhog Day”: I rise up, learn the paper, train, take an after-lunch nap, write for a few hours, after which spend my night time studying books (principally fiction) and magazines like Author’s Digest, Poets & Writers, and the New Yorker whereas watching TV. It’s nothing too extraordinary, however I’ve been constant.

I’ve by no means adopted any food regimen. I eat and drink what I would like, sparsely. I’ve been principally a vegetarian, though we sometimes eat poultry and seafood, however by no means pink meat. I’ve by no means smoked, regardless of the temptation.

For quite a few years, I did the quarter-hour of day by day train advisable by the Royal Canadian Air Force. This consisted of solar salutes, push-ups, squats, and in-place jogging. I labored in an workplace for 40 years and I made some extent of taking a stroll every single day at lunch — even when it was freezing chilly outdoors. My colleagues would ask, “Did you do your day by day constitutional stroll even as we speak?” After retirement, I joined a gymnasium to proceed my train routine.

I haven’t performed any demanding sports activities or participated in marathons that resulted in damage or long-term well being points. That is in no way a criticism of those that do these items. I love them. Nevertheless, on the finish of every day, I’m content material to have accomplished one thing helpful. Maybe this self-discipline has contributed to my being within the fine condition that I’m. I settle for the truth that typically sickness comes with out discover and for no cause. I assume I’ve been fortunate as effectively.

From left to right: The author's son Sachin, daughter-in-law Alka, granddaughter Ruhi, wife Bharati, and the author explore the gardens of Indianapolis Museum of Art in October 2022.
From left to proper: The writer’s son Sachin, daughter-in-law Alka, granddaughter Ruhi, spouse Bharati, and the writer discover the gardens of Indianapolis Museum of Artwork in October 2022.

Courtesy of Ashok Shenolikar

6. Hang around with your pals.

Final 12 months, Dr. Vivek Murthy launched a brand new surgeon general advisory calling consideration to the general public well being disaster of loneliness, isolation and lack of connection in our nation. It doesn’t should be that means — and it doesn’t take a lot to fight it. Connection might be small discuss with individuals we meet in a library, in an train class, or making a fast name to a buddy or relative.

Making new pals and having a social circle has been nice for my well-being. I met a number of good individuals after I managed the Northern Virginia Writers Guild in my 70s. And I made pals with individuals who attend my Spanish-speaking meetup group. We invite them to our home for brunch every so often.

My spouse’s outgoing character has helped us make pals in our neighborhood, too. We’re a part of a foodie group that goes out for lunch each month or so. Typically we meet our pals for completely happy hour. A few of our pals have been in our lives for over 40 years. Lots of them have change into like our prolonged household; we have fun with them on joyous events and lean on them in occasions of bother.

7. Don’t let battle get to you.

All through our lives, we come throughout many alternative individuals, together with mother and father, siblings, pals, neighbors, work colleagues and vital others, and tensions can come up when our views battle with others. Disagreements might be triggered by absolutely anything — from what to eat for dinner or what film to look at to (in fact) politics — and it’s typically laborious to return to a consensus.

So, how will we keep a very good relationship over an extended interval? As Audrey Hepburn as soon as mentioned, “Happiness is well being and a brief reminiscence!” What’s using retaining a grudge? Simply overlook it and go on along with your life. If you happen to don’t like what somebody, together with your partner, says, you’ll be able to have a cordial dialogue as an alternative of getting mad and throwing tantrums. Finally, relationships are a two-way road: We will’t management how one other individual behaves, we are able to solely management our conduct.

The author and his wife, Bharati, visited Iguazu Falls in Brazil in March 2024.
The writer and his spouse, Bharati, visited Iguazu Falls in Brazil in March 2024.

Courtesy of Ashok Shenolikar

The place do I am going from right here? I’ll hold residing the way in which I now do. I fear about getting a prolonged sickness as a result of I don’t wish to be a burden to anybody. If my finish has to return, let it come quick.

Typically I additionally fear concerning the security of our kids and grandchildren as a result of there are such a lot of loopy issues occurring all over the world every single day. Nevertheless, you’ll be able to’t dwell in a continuing state of concern. If one thing occurs, cope with it then. Take pleasure in your life as a lot as you’ll be able to. That’s not a secret system — it simply helps to say it out loud each infrequently.

Ashok Shenolikar is a novelist, short-story author, and essayist primarily based in Ellicott Metropolis, Maryland. A retired engineer, his writing might be learn on his weblog, ashokshenolikar.com. His essays have been printed in The Academy of Coronary heart and Thoughts, The Pilcrow & Dagger and India Overseas. He managed the Northern Virginia Author’s Guild Meetup from 2013 by 2019. His novel “Choices They Made” is offered in paperback and Kindle variations.

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